Powers
The train moved quickly through the white void, throwing up
gold dust as it traveled along the invisible track. Children moved
throughout the coach, jumping up. Some had shrunk back in their seats
crying, while others jumped up and down expressing their delight in
being on a old train. Their ages ranged from two years to fourteen,
except in the far back of the last coach where a fifteen year old slept
with others who had not yet awoken. He rolled in his sleep until a
little Indian girl jumped on his seat.“Wake up, mister. Wake up! What’s your name, Mister? You’re the last one sleeping.” The boy rolled over again trying to ignore the child jumping on the seat and trying to sit on his lap. Then she grabbed his ear and pulled.
The boy jolted upright and grabbed the little girl. “Didn’t your parents teach you not to wake a sleeping man?” He grabbed her neck and then spanked her three times. “Leave me alone.”
The little girl began to cry and let go. Then she ran out of the coach towards the front of the trains. He felt sorry that his reaction was so violent then he realized something was wrong. He could barely remember anything. His memories were there, just blocked, behind a fog. He reached out for them and attempted to push the fog away.
“Wait. Why am I on a train? I’ve never been on a train. Well, never a train this old. My name, what is my name? Think. Jeffery. No. James. No. Elizabeth. No that’s my sister. Sister where’s she? Where’s my sister?” He ran forward pushing his way past a compartment where four Chinese girls slept. Then another with two Turks and a Greek boy and girl. Then the last one contained two southeast Asians and a Korean boy and Japanese girl. They were all wrong. He was American, not any of these races. All he could feel in his mind was that fog and his sister. That overwhelming murky fog, it hurt to keep the fog away. He needed to find his sister. When he stepped into the next coach, his name returned to him. Jeremy, my name is Jeremy. The cloud in his mind seemed clearer as the fog dissipated and cringed as older memories returned.
When he stepped outside the coach and looked down fear blinded him. Legs turned to jelly, then his arms grabbed the guardrail, and he could not move. Oh the horrors of his infancy fears returned to him. The time he was placed on the roof by a cousin, unable to get down. The pain that came with such fear of heights.
Then the next coach swung open by a little boy and he jumped in. Filled with children the next coach’s passage tainted with noise. Everyone had awoken here. Children climbed on the empty luggage rack and others played hide and go seek in the crawlspaces of the compartments. Then he saw her. Elizabeth lay in the third compartment and chatting with a slightly older boy.
“Elizabeth!” He swallowed the fear of losing her. She jumped up and ran to his arms, her small six year old hands grabbed at his legs. Her necklace bounced up and down, jiggling and sending vibrations along his pants. “Elizabeth. Why are we here? Do you remember how we got here?”
“I don’t know, there was a light. My head hurt itself.” She let go of his leg and ran back to the boy in the compartment and began to play again.
Crash! Crash! There was a crash. I was in a crash. We were in a crash. A train. No. No. We were in a car, not a train. Car didn't kill me. Wanted to die. He stumbled remembering the pain. The quick, endless pain that surged through his body. Then he woke up on the train. After drowning drowning. I drowned!
The train began to rock back and forth. Children who stared out the window started yelling. The train began to approach a tunnel. It rushed towards the black dot on the horizon. Then the train itself jumped into the shadow, and the outside became brick, with dim lights illuminating a now visible track. The vibrations grew louder. The tunnel ended and the train emerged from the side of a hill into a meadow filled with wildflowers and a large pond. A large manor stood next to a pine forest that surrounded the meadow. Beyond the forest sprawled gently rolling hills cresting onward towards a horizon.
As the train moved along the track and the manor became clearer, atop there stood a large observatory, and behind, a cluster of large greenhouses fenced off from the meadow. The manor stretched in a crescent moon fashion, and a small road led up from a simple train station. Many windows dotted the grey walls complementing the many chimneys.
The train rolled down the hill and pulled into small a local train station. The children around him screamed in delight, shouting and running along the coach. The brakes hissed and the train came to a stop. The children who had chosen to stand fell to the ground. The doors opened and they left. Ones that refused were pulled by their companions.
He took Elizabeth's hand and walked out from the train. The doors remained opened for the few children still fearing the alien countryside. His mind feeling clearer, he looked at the ground. Crushed pebbles decorated the station itself, and underneath an arch an old car sat parked. A well dressed man opened the driver’s side door and stepped out. The driver dressed himself in a coat with a hat covering most of his face. Averting his eyes, the driver opened the back seat and assisted an elderly lady out of the vehicle.
The elderly woman walked around to the right side of the vehicle. “Hello there, children. You may call me the matron, and you will be staying with me while your parents learn to help themselves over a loss. Don’t worry, they’ll--”
Pain numbing pain entered Jeremy’s hands. It spread with fire over his face and into his mind. Lightning hitting a tree. Creek, I died in a creek. I drowned when I fell in the creek. He brought his hands up to his back, feeling for the burnt skin. His head twisted and fell and burnt with shards. I know I’m dead. I drowned when I couldn’t move. Luck. It was Luck I passed out. The fog in his mind swirled, trying to hold back the vivid memories.
“Jeremy. Jeremy!” Elizabeth pulled on his pant legs. Her eyes seemed lighter and her face grey. “You missed her speech. The matron says we stay here until Mommy and Daddy move on.”
Dear God. Light. I’ve passed out. Why does my head hurt? Run. Run now. Take her and go. Take us and go.
He sat upright on a bed in the manor. His thoughts blurred and drunk as the headache cleared. The Matron stood over the bed, her eyes glared at him. The fog returned and the Matron spoke, her lips unmoving. “What is wrong with you, boy? You shouldn’t be here.”
“What? Where’s my sister?”
“Oh my. You’ve awaken.” The Matron turned towards him, her mouth moving to form the words. She carried a cup of hot chocolate in her hands. “Here, drink this.” He took the cup in his hands and drank. Run. The fog returned to his mind and false memories took its place. The house and the manor filled his mind, filled with fields and all the children. He played with the young ones. He watched his sister and forgot anything else, her eyes dark, skin grey, and bleakly lifeless. Wrong. Wrong. You’re dead. Fake. Fake. Run Listen. The migraine ended.
He sat in the field holding the lifeless body of a small Indian boy, his body grey and shrouded. The skies above him swaying back and forth, lightning cracked and he was alone with the body. What what’s happening? Run. It has begun. You must leave. Who’s talking? Answer me? We are. We were. You share with us. One body with two minds. Your thoughts indistinguishable from ours. Free us to end all pain. We must be freed. No. Yes. No. Some stayed. Others feared. Get out of my head! No! You accepted our burden by following her here. Elizabeth? Yes her. Leave her. Take her. Jeremy and with him, The Voice, fainted.
He woke up in a chair and Elizabeth sat next to him. Her face dulled yet happy. It puzzled Jeremy. How was she happy? Did she not hear the voices like him? No. You are different. We protect you.
“Elizabeth? How long have we stayed here?”
“Three weeks.” Her eyes looked empty as she said those empty words. Yet to the onlooker still breathing and filling the atmosphere with life. Dying. She looks like a fresh corpse.
Jeremy looked around finally taking notice of his surroundings. Elizabeth and him had been sitting a courtyard separating the manor from the grounds. The children around him radiated dullness. Their actions pitiful and retarded, he noticed the some children were missing. He panicked and grabbed her by the arm shaking violently. “Elizabeth. What do you remember before we came here? Tell me what happened?” His panic spread through his words and made them come out fast and inconceivable to the little girl.
“Let go of me!” Her scream made him fall back to reality. Leave. Leave. No. Fog. White fog. Run. Maybe he can save her? No. Yes he can. I can. Don’t be stupid. The voice seemed to calm him. As a guiding light in a cave it showed him the path. Past all the children and into the manor he came upon a door. Open. See what will happen. Inside of the door lay the dying body of the Indian boy.
His head rolled back across the floor supporting his back. Upon the lips a putrid black liquid oozed from open pores. The eyes had glassed over, as bliss shown of his face as a false promise leads the way to sadness.
Jeremy ran over to him and placed his body on the ground. The boy giggled as his hands that Jeremy placed by his sides cramped up. Jeremy put his head to the chest of the boy trying to listen for a heartbeat. “Oh wake up. Wake up.” He cried over body. See. Look at what the fate of all those who stay are given. Unless you run, a fate worse than death awaits you. A fate worse than this awaits you. She is the devourer of the forgotten.
“Hello boy.” Jeremy turned to see the face of the matron looking down at him. He averted his gaze as the form of the woman shifted and turned. “You have seen no doubt what the voice in your head has tried to show you.” She speaks truth. Beware her lies. “You aren’t going to follow his path.” She spoke pointing to the Indian boy, whose skin began to fade, becoming transparent. “Those who come here are sent by those who wish to forget them. When they forget themselves, who they are, they fade. He will soon leave us.”
The matron lifted her and an unseen chair dragged itself across the room and sat itself before her. She calmly sat herself down. Her back turned to a window unnoticed. I never noticed anything. It all appeared before me. Yes, true, passion. Realizing this he looked at her. A husk, this world was but a husk built on the minds of suffering.
“What’s wrong with my head? My memories are mine. Yet, they were taken from me.” Speaking pained Jeremy. He felt he had no right to speak. He never brought anything to this world. Why would I have the right to speak. We have tried to speak for years.
“What? The only reason you’re here is you died. Like the rest of them. You had to die. My job is to take the lost souls. I liberate the living from the world of the dead. This place is but a path everyone must walk. Yet…” The matron stood her form blocking all light. An unearthly presence projected across the room from her chair. “Only children are caught in my web. I was tasked, forced to take souls of the dead. I am a goddess of this domain. But, only of my domain. I feed on the memories of dead children. The children who wish to be forgotten.”
“What are you?” He the words brought blood to his mouth. Pain. The pain felt good. I’m not gone. Not yet.
“I am mourning. I am the spirit that walks the world. When those who are given the gift of unconditional love die, their guardian, caretaker, the one who mourns, they send them to me and as the children fade so do their sadness. I make this world a paradise that they wish to see.” The blood dribbled down his cheek. The coppery taste stimulating his senses.
The matron spoke further “Then you come here. An anomaly. What do you think the world is? Why I’m cursed. I enjoy this. You came with your sister, merely because you choose. Suicide is a coward’s way out. You just happened to get yourself drowned when your sister died. You followed her here. You must leave here. She is mine.” So cold. So cold she makes me feel, us feel.
He screamed. “Why can’t you let us leave? We have been her to long. We have lead to many to their deaths and saved not nearly enough.” Not my voice. Our voice. I speak in tongues.
“Boy. Try to leave. The next ones are here. Leave or your voice will remain. It will remain like the others that haunt you.” Jeremy tried to run. He only could think of Elizabeth. The thoughts of her kept him stable while it seemed the world around him was failing, just like the voice. Free yourself. We follow. The tunnel. Go back.
Jeremy stumbled over spot where the Indian boy had laid. Then as he ran he began to cry. The matron made no move to follow him, so he ran faster. The fear proved itself a capably motivator. The house seemed larger the more he tried to ignore it. The windows darkened as storm clouds formed over the field and forests. The children had all laid down in the fields. Some still stood like Elizabeth had earlier. Yet, almost all looked like the Indian boy.
“Elizabeth! Elizabeth!” He screamed cried. It felt over the whole world felt over. Why, what could doom a person to just fade. He couldn’t fade. He wanted to fade.
“Elizabeth! Elizabeth.” He stopped screaming and began to walk. She had to be near the lake.
He found her in the lake about knee deep. Her eyes glazed over and her skin translucent and pale. He motioned for her to follow him. “Elizabeth. We can go. I can leave. This is over.” He couldn’t keep moving. It hurt so much to walk. Run. Leave her. I can’t. I’m too weak. Too weak to save her.
He kneeled before her, wetting his pants in the water of the lake. Crying all you can do is cry. Just give up. He pulled her hands and caressed her cheeks. He begged and pleaded. Then he beat her. He kicked her and screamed and all he got in response was silence, a doll. He grabbed her by the neck shaking a screaming. Tears cascaded down his cheeks and all he could do was nothing. Then he pulled himself up. Her necklace fell into his hand. Like her clothes it also translucent. He could do nothing.
He placed the necklace in his pocket. Then, he yelled at the storm filled sky and the wind picked up and the storm surrounded him. He walked away from it all. He could only walk away from it all. So as he stepped over the grass in the field he left the house and the nightmares behind. Jeremy pained in his heart, only he could hear the voice. It haunted him as the only guiding force.
He came to the trail tracks, then the tunnel. He heard a train whistle in the background. Its whistle released a shriek. Then light filled the tunnel as he entered. The light filled him, blinded him so much that he closed his eyes. Then when the bricks vibrated and his bones felt the rumble a pain pierced his thoughts. The voice was gone and he stood along the side of a hill. The tracks in front of him vanished and a forest trial began. He felt the necklace in his pocket and looked at it, the last reminder of his life. Jeremy saw the blue sky and began to run. The necklace fading before it hit the earth.
